I have to apologize I went back and had to check some dates and realized that this piece was written when I was 7 and at that time my Grandma Ida and Gus were living in Idaho. The September after this was written my parent separated for several months and while my brother’s stayed with my Dad I had to go with my Mom to Idaho for a long visit with Grandma. I didn’t mind spending time with my Grandmother, she was awesome, but I missed my brothers. The first story I told with this piece actually took place 3 years later when I was around 9 years old. Again I apologize for messing up the time line.
SINCERELY
I have searched my mind, my heart and my soul for the answers as to where our future lies.
Is there ever a chance for survival or rekindling once the beautiful flame of love dies?
Once I loved and cared for you so deeply and that these feelings could change never entered my thought.
My God, what has happened to our lives? What is the answer? Is it what we have sown we have wrought?
What chance is there for a castle to last when it is built on nothing more than crumbling sand?
Perhaps if we’d had a more solid foundation what we tried to build would have been able to stand.
What I feel I know isn’t hatred but only defeat, anguish and deep frustrating despair in my heart.
It seems that the more we are together, instead of growing closer, we just keep drifting further apart.
When we met we were both really searching for a new life and someone for whom we could trust and care,
I guess we just never learned enough about each other to be able to build a life we could share.
I guess one can be too giving and by not demanding or receiving there is no fulfillment on their part.
While with others there is too much demanding and what they do give doesn’t really come from the heart.
There are many good memories along with the bad ones and its these that I want to hold dear,
Sincerely hoping to remain friends and have respect and consideration for each other tho we are far apart or near.
Tho our hurts and mistakes aren’t forgotten, lets learn from them, not let them leave scars for which we pay.
I pray that we can find happiness, fulfillment and a better way of life, should we go our seperate way.
By: Ida L. Apodaca
5/17/75